Tag Archives: Victoria Terrinoni

Four Chaplains’ Story Epitomizes the Role of Military Chaplaincy

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Seventy-eight years ago tomorrow, Feb. 3, four Army Chaplains gave their life jackets to crew members of the doomed and sinking Army Transport Ship Dorchester, thus sealing their own fate.

The four chaplains — Lt. George Fox, a Methodist; Lt. Alexander Goode, a Jewish Rabbi; Lt. John Washington, a Roman Catholic Priest; and Lt. Clark Poling, a Dutch Reformed minister — embody the spirit of what it means to be a chaplain in the Armed Forces.

The Four Chaplains’ stamp issued on May 28, 1948.

They were four men of 902 aboard the Dorchester, traveling from Newfoundland, Canada to an American base in Greenland when a German U-boat torpedoed the ship. Amidst the panic on board, the four chaplains spread out and started tending to the wounded and calming the frightened soldiers.

Because of the way the ship listed, survivors could not launch several lifeboats on the port side. As one story tells it,

Petty Officer John J. Mahoney, reeling from the cold, headed back towards his cabin. “Where are you going?” a voice of calm in the sea of distressed asked. “To get my gloves,” Mahoney replied. “Here, take these,” said Rabbi Goode as he handed a pair of gloves to the young officer. “I can’t take those gloves,” Mahoney replied. “Never mind,” the Rabbi responded. “I have two pairs.” It was only long after that Mahoney realized that the chaplain never intended to leave the ship.

John Brinsfield, published by the US Army, January 28, 2014

The four chaplains also passed out life jackets and when they realized there were no more to be given, they each took off their own life jackets, helping to save four more men, at the expense of their own lives.

 “It was the finest thing I have seen or hope to see this side of heaven.”

A survivor from the Dorchester. US Army, January 28, 2014

The chaplains stood on the deck of the Dorchester, arms linked, singing hymns, and praying. They were among the 674 people who died that day. The 230 survivors were rescued by two cutter ships accompanying the convoy across the seas.

The chaplains were awarded the Distinguished Service Cross and the Purple Heart posthumously, but because their death didn’t meet the requirements to receive the Medal of Honor, a special medal for heroism, the Four Chaplains’ Medal, was awarded to the men on January 18, 1961.

A replica of the Four Chaplains’ Medal

They are the only four to ever receive the medal, and it will never be awarded to anyone else.

This story makes me so proud of our chaplain corps. As a retired chaplain’s wife, I know my own husband would do the same thing if he was required to. When the New York City Fire Department chaplain died on September 11, 2001, I looked at the Good Chaplain and said, “That would probably be you if you could be there.” He would have been doing his job, helping people right in the thick of things.

Until next time,

Vicki

Victoria Terrinoni is the author of the new book, Where You Go, I Will Go: Lessons From a Military Spouse available here or by clicking the Shop tab above.

Snowmaggedon finally hit central Illinois. My grand-pup, Korben, the golden retriever, is enjoying himself with his buddy, Tucker.

News Items Bring Back Fond Memories of the Good Chaplain’s Deployment to Eastern Africa

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The enset, or false banana plant. When the Good Chaplain saw the article, he said, “Hey, I’ve eaten that!”

The Good Chaplain saw an article the other day on false bananas, and it brought back a flood of memories about his time in Eastern Africa. Lately, many news items bring back memories of his deployment in 2010-11 to Djibouti. On Sunday, our local Illinois Army National Guard unit deployed 200 people to Djibouti.

All this news comes at a good time as I outline our book on the Good Chaplain’s time in Eastern Africa. The working title is Eastern Africa: Stories of Hope and Faith.

We have fond, and not so fond, memories of that deployment. The Good Chaplain had terrific experiences traveling around that portion of the continent and visiting with orphanages, village leaders, ambassadors, and even the Ethiopian Pope of the Orthodox Church.

I had fun too, visiting Illinois Girl, my parents, and being free to come and go as I pleased.

No one comes away from a deployment unchanged.

Victoria Terrinoni

But a friend was also killed in Afghanistan during this time. And there was the monster tornado bearing down on Moore, Oklahoma, where we lived at the time. So those are sad and scary memories.

Each deployment has its good times and bad for both the deployed member and the partner left at home. Unfortunately, no one comes away from a deployment unchanged. It’s the nature of the beast.

But we must make the best of the time apart to grow and learn. So I look forward to each opportunity to discover a new strength or talent. And now that we are retired, I wonder when he will go away again — at least for a night!

Until next time,

Vicki

Victoria Terrinoni is the author of Where You Go, I Will Go: Lessons From a Military Spouse. She followed the Good Chaplain around for 31 years as a military spouse. Available on Amazon or the Shop tab above.

Being a kept woman was satisfying and fun while it lasted

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Someone once asked me what I do for a living, and I quickly replied, “I am a kept woman.”

Let me put out there that the Good Chaplain has never endorsed this view. But especially in the last part of his career, I didn’t work for financial gain. I lived off him.

The dictionary doesn’t define “kept woman,” but I have my own. A kept woman is a woman who does nothing but play. She doesn’t work outside the home for money and, she has no children, or they are grown up and out of the house. This last point is crucial. Stay-at-home moms are not kept women because of the very idea that they are raising children. She is not free to go out when she pleases and frequently needs to be home when the kids get home from school. Too many restrictions to be considered a kept woman. Sorry, stay-at-home moms. Your day will come.

Photo by ANTONI SHKRABA production on Pexels.com

Don’t get me wrong, though. My definition of a kept woman is not what you see in movies like “Goodfellas,” where the mobsters all have a woman on the side stashed away in a penthouse living in the lap of luxury. I’m a military spouse. I don’t think anyone considers our lifestyle luxurious.

Photo by Jou00e3o Gustavo Rezende on Pexels.com

I didn’t become a kept woman until we moved to Alaska the second time in 2006. It was the last time I had a paying job, and my girls were in college. The lifestyle fits my definition. I came and went as I pleased. I joined various organizations such as the Spouse Club, squadron spouse groups, the women’s group at the chapel, and others. I volunteered, mainly at the Thrift Shop on different bases.

Photo by Burst on Pexels.com

Sometimes I felt guilty about being a kept woman since it required the Good Chaplain to supply all my money to have fun. But he didn’t seem to mind. He always reminded me that it was “our” money and that I contributed in other ways like cooking meals and cleaning the house (insert hysterical laughter here). I hate housework, but I couldn’t justify hiring a cleaning service while I lolled around all day as a kept woman.

Now that I’ve published a book and am working on a second one, along with writing this blog, I’m not sure if I can still call myself a kept woman. The Good Chaplain put up the seed money for the first book, but I am making some money off it, so I am technically bringing in some income, so the answer is no. But it was fun while it lasted.

Until next time,

Vicki

Do you aspire to be a kept woman? Are you one already? Let me know in the comment section below.

Victoria Terrinoni is the author of Where You Go, I Will Go: Lessons From a Military Spouse. She followed the Good Chaplain around for 31 years as a military spouse. To purchase her book, go to the Buy Here tab on this website.

The Good Chaplain’s Last Deployment Provides Fodder for New Book

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In November 2010, the Good Chaplain embarked on what turned out to be his last deployment. It was significant for several reasons,

  • It was his longest deployment to date — 7 months.
  • It was the first deployment since the girls left home.
  • The mission was cool.

The Good Chaplain went to the Combined Joint Task Force-Horn of Africa at Camp Lemonnier in Djibouti. He was the Deputy Command Chaplain CJTF-HOA and Deputy Director of Religious Affairs for Eastern Africa.

Although Djibouti is not known as a hotbed of tourism, the Good Chaplain traveled to several countries in the area, engaging with the locals to help build connections between the United States and those countries. Part of the mission was to help communities become more self-sufficient.

Although I was scared to be alone with him so far away, I was also excited for this opportunity for the Good Chaplain. The then Chief of Chaplains asked me how I felt about this deployment and then assured me the Chaplain Corps never lost a chaplain in Djibouti, except for the one who died of a heart attack. Until then, I wasn’t worried about my husband’s safety.

Although Djibouti did not have any violence at the time, the camp was just 10 miles from the Somalia border. So it gave me cause for concern. Also, several of the countries the Good Chaplain visited were amidst some sort of strife. But I knew he was well protected when he traveled.

The Good Chaplain traveled to many of these countries.

What we didn’t count on was the Good Chaplain picking up some sort of virus, disease, or parasite(we never found out the cause) that left him with lifelong liver disease and ended his deployments for the rest of his career.

The stories of hope, the people he met, and the faith they all had in the face of difficulties we could never dream of led me to decide to write a second book on this deployment. I want to use his trips and experiences to highlight the hope people can have, especially in the face of adversity.

The working title is Eastern Africa: Stories of Hope and Faith. Please give me your thoughts on the book’s subject and on the title. Is this something you would read? Let me know in the comments section below.

I look forward to your input.

Until next time,

Vicki

How Alaskan Winters Provided my Crazy Kids Adventurous Christmas Breaks

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This time of year, when we lived at Eielson Air Force Base, Alaska, the girls prepared to go back to college in Illinois. It was bittersweet. I missed my girls, but I enjoyed the quiet once I had the house back to myself.

Every Christmas for the three years we lived in Fairbanks, the girls, the Good Chaplain’s mom, and Soccer Stud came to visit. One year they also brought a college friend. They participated in the Christmas revelry of the base and enjoyed the novelty of minus 40 temperatures.

Soccer Stud especially liked the subzero temperatures. On the coldest night, we all bundled up and went to the marquee at the high school on base for a picture under the temperature readings. On his first visit, I promised Soccer Stud’s mom that I wouldn’t let him do anything stupid. But on his first morning, he went onto our snow-covered deck in boots, shorts, and no shirt to take a picture next to the outdoor thermometer! Boys!

Soccer Stud & Illinois Girl in front of the marquee showing minus 44 temperatures.

While the Good Chaplain’s mom would stay bundled up inside our cozy home, the kids played in the great outdoors, exploring much of what an Alaskan winter had to offer. They went dog-sledding, cross country skiing, sledding, and even learned the fine art of curling.

Mrs. Tech Sergeant bundled up for her dog-sled ride.

We took them to visit neighbors. They went with us to Christmas parties and even joined us for the annual New Year’s Eve bonfire on the lake. Yes, the fire was actually built on the lake. It was a little unnerving to hear the ice cracking beneath your feet from the heat of the fire, but the lake was frozen solid, and no danger existed. Finally, after toasting the New Year at midnight, we went home and to bed.

The kids enjoyed the New Year’s Eve bonfire on the lake.

The Chena Hot Springs highlighted one year. It was minus 40 something, but we all donned our swimsuits and headed to the natural hot springs. Since it was so cold out, our hair would freeze in funny compositions. Soccer Stud’s hair was down to his shoulders that year, and as he stood up after getting it wet, it froze at odd angles, sticking up here and there. A group of Japanese tourists started giggling and pointing to him, saying, “Godzilla!” At six-foot-three inches tall with funky hair, he was quite a sight.

All too soon, the vacation was over. The kids and Mom packed up and went to the airport for the early morning flight to Chicago. We gave them props for wanting to visit in the dead of winter and looked forward to the following Christmas when more winter fun would be had.

Until next time,

Vicki

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and a Happy New Year!

The Great 2009 Blizzard Canceled Christmas Eve and Disheartened the Good Chaplain

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The whirring sound of tires spinning on ice brought a twinkle to the Good Chaplain’s eye. He peered out the window and saw our neighbor, Kevin’s, car stuck between the street and his driveway in a snowdrift.

“Someone’s stuck,” the Good Chaplain said, glee in his voice. “I’m going to go help.”

On Christmas Eve 2009 in Moore, Oklahoma, the Good Chaplain walked around in a funk. So the commander closed Tinker Air Force Base and canceled the Christmas Eve service. The Good Chaplain never canceled Christmas services before.

That day, Oklahoma City officially received 13.5 inches of snow. It was a mess. Although Oklahoma would get some snow and ice in the winter, that amount was a lot at one time. And people didn’t know how to drive in it with their Toyotas, Hondas, and other small sedans. Everything shut down. Cars were stuck all over the place, accidents were happening as cars slid into each other, and unfortunately, some people lost their lives.

But we had just moved to the area in the late summer from Fairbanks, Alaska. So, to us, this storm was a half-day event. So nothing would have closed, and people would be out as usual. And that’s why the Good Chaplain was so bummed.

The view from our house during the Oklahoma Blizzard of 2009

He quickly donned his winter clothing and went to help Kevin push his car off the street into the driveway. As Kevin explained, his new wife, Jen, was at work about seven miles away. Kevin was trying to go pick her up when he got stuck. It was their first Christmas together as a married couple, and neither one wanted to spend it apart.

That’s when the Good Chaplain realized he could be the hero. Hands on his hips, chin tilted up, he declared, “I can help!” So, he came home, told me what was going on, jumped in our 4-wheel drive, GMC Yukon, and off he and Kevin went to rescue Jen.

Meanwhile, I watched television and read a magazine while my mother-in-law, visiting for the holidays, paced the floor. She’s a Nervous Nelly, anyway, and having the Good Chaplain out in that weather made her anxious. At one point, she looked at me as if to say, “how can you be so calm?” I shrugged my shoulders. He’d been out in worse, and I knew he could drive in these conditions. It didn’t bother me. I was just happy that he could do something productive instead of moping around the house.

It took a while to go those seven miles and back through snowdrifts, around stuck vehicles, and up icy hills, but the Good Chaplain, Kevin, and Jen all made it home safely to celebrate a wonderful holiday with their loved ones.

Until next time,

Vicki

Do you have any snowstorm stories? Let me know in the comments below.

Shameless plug: My book, Where You Go, I Will Go: Lessons From a Military Spouse, would make a wonderful Christmas gift for that special someone in your life who is in the military. You can buy it by going to the Book tab on this site and purchasing through Amazon or directly from me.

The Second Long-Distance Wedding Ceremony was Easier to Plan

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Two weddings in two months are a lot to handle for anyone. It seems impossible when one is planned from Alaska and the other from Illinois. But the Good Chaplain and I pulled it off.

Illinois Girl and Soccer Stud exchange vows in this beautiful venue.

Illinois Girl’s wedding was outdoors in August at a venue about 90 minutes from home. The forum was a great choice — an alcove surrounded by cliffs. But that August, it was HOT. On the day of the wedding, it was 91 degrees and rainy.

The ever-optimistic Good Chaplain said not to worry about the rain. It would stop before the ceremony. And it did. Amazing. He is the weather prayer warrior. He prays for specific weather, and it happens.

Planning Illinois Girl’s wedding wasn’t as tricky as planning Mrs. Tech Sergeant’s because Illinois Girl was around to do a lot of tasks that needed doing. She and Soccer Stud took care of the venue, flowers, photographer, and cake.

Actually, Illinois Girl called me all excited one day and said, “We’re going to make cupcakes for my wedding.” At which point, I replied, “Cupcakes are a great idea, but we are not making them. Didn’t you watch that episode of Bridezillas?”

On Bridezillas, a bride decided to make cupcakes for her wedding, not considering they needed to be baked and decorated the week of the wedding. She also did not consider that her sister’s maid-of-honor was nine months pregnant. The bride was very indignant that her sister had her baby that week and couldn’t help make the cupcakes. So, no, we were not going along that route.

“But, Mom, decorated cupcakes are expensive,” Illinois Girl said. When I asked her how expensive, she said she could get them for $1 apiece, decorated. That worked out to about $200. I reminded her that was half of what her sister paid for her wedding cake.

My only disappointment with this wedding was that I missed the rehearsal dinner. And I blame the Good Chaplain for that one. We decided to camp at a nearby campground for the weekend, but we misjudged the amount of time it would take us towing the trailer to get to the venue, so we ended up pulling the trailer with us to the rehearsal. But afterward, the Good Chaplain insisted on setting up the trailer at the campground before going to the rehearsal dinner. So we arrived as most of the guests were leaving. Naturally, I was not happy, and apparently, it still bothers me today.

As we arrived at the venue on the wedding day, it was pouring rain. A big tent was set up for the guests to sit under and stay dry. Photos of the couple were taken earlier, a practice I was not familiar with. Apparently, the groom waits with his back turned until the bride comes out, and the photographer captures that first-time-he-sees-her moment when he turns around. It lessens the number of photos taken after the ceremony so everyone can get to the party faster.

As I mentioned before, the Good Chaplain is the weather prayer warrior, so he said the rain would stop before the ceremony, and it did about 30 minutes earlier. But the ground was still wet and many a high heel sunk in the mud.

But the ceremony was beautiful, my daughter was beautiful, and the reception was terrific. And 11 years later, they still live in Illinois with their two beautiful daughters, one Golden Retriever and one cat.

When the Good Chaplain deployed later that year, he said it was his wedding financial recovery deployment.

Next up, the blizzard that ruined Christmas.

Until then,

Vicki

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